- You remember when Jordache jeans were cool.
- You had a "Members Only" jacket and wore it all day long.
- You wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that folded up into a pouch you could wear around your waist.
- In your eighth grade class picture, you're wearing an Izod shirt with the collar turned up.
- A predominant color in your childhood photos is "plaid."
- You've ever shopped at a Banana Republic or Benetton, but not in the last five years, okay?
- You're doing absolutely nothing pertaining to your major.
- Knickers and leg warmers were cool
- You ever had feathered hair
- You owned a pair of rainbow suspenders just like Mork used to wear.
- Your hair, at some point in time in the 80's, became something which can only be described by the phrase, "I was just experimenting."
- You ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut.
- The "Brady Bunch Movie" brought back cool memories.
- You ever rang someone's door and said, "Landshark."
- You remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV.
- You've ever conversationally used the phrase, "Jane, you ignorant slut."
- You watched "H.R. Puffenstuff" as a child, but now that you're older, you really understand that it would have been much better had you known about drugs at the time.
- Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the English language. In fact, you cannot recite the Preamble to the Constitution without singing.
- Honestly remember when film critics raved that no movie could ever possibly get better special effects than those in the movie "TRON."
- This timeline appropriately describes actual events in your life:
- Star Wars opens, you are still in single digit ages, and you think the creatures are WAY cool.
- Empire Strikes Back opens, you are now in early double digit ages, and you are convinced that the special effects are much better, the characters are cool, and you want one of every collectible out there.
- Return of the Jedi hits the theaters... you are now a teenager, and you cannot get your eyes off Princess Leia or Han Solo.
- You ever used the phrase "kiss my grits" in conversation.
- You remember trying to guess the episode of the "Brady Bunch" from the first scene.
- You remember, "Hey, let's be careful out there."
- You're parents wanted you to attend medical school, but you decided it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes anyway.
- You know who shot J.R.
- This rings a bell: "... and my name is Charlie. They work for me."
- You know all the words to the double album set of "Grease."
- You were too young to see "The Blue Lagoon" so you just had to settle for second-hand reports.
- You remember when there was only "G, PG, and R", none of this PG-13 or NC-17 crap.
- You learned to swim about the same time "Jaws" came out and you still carry emotional scars to this day.
- "Wonder Twin powers, activate! Form of a tiger, shape of an iceberg."
- You remember when your cable TV box had the three rows of numbers and you had to move the selector switch accordingly.
- You had ringside seats for Luke and Laura's wedding
- The ABC After School Special "My Mom's Having a Baby" actually taught you stuff you didn't know.
- You never thought there was anything strange about Bert and Ernie living together.
- You know, by heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song.
- You sat with your friends on a Friday night and dialed "8-6-7-5-3-0-9" to see if Jenny would answer.
- You actually know who Rick Springfield is.
- You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on, after all... look at Tab.
- Your jaw would ache by the time you finished those "brick-sized" packages of Bazooka gum.
- You remember the days when "safe sex" meant "my parents are gone for the weekend."
- While in high school, you and all your friends discussed elaborate plans to get together again at the end of the century and play "1999" by Prince over and over again.
- You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini-van. You rode in the back of the station wagon and faced the cars behind you.
- You've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the following:
- "When I was younger…"
- "When I was your age..."
- "You know, back when..."
- You remember with pain the sad day when the Green Machine hit the streets and made your old Big Wheel quite obsolete.
- The phrase, "Where's the beef?" still doubles you over with laughter.
- You freaked out when you found that you now fall into the "26-50" age category on most questionnaires.
- You ever wanted to be gagged with a spoon.
- Three words: Atari, IntelliVision and Coleco. Sound familiar?
- You remember when VCR's cost $1,000.
- You once had a rotary dial telephone.
- You're starting to view getting carded to buy alcohol as a GOOD thing.
- You're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affect YOU) that maybe having kids go to school year-round wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.